I’ve gone ‘round the sun enough times to know that most of us need to hear this sometimes. I don’t care if you’re a CEO or a cleaning person, a life coach or a basketball coach, an AARP member or a kindergartener. Self-doubt starts early, and it journeys right along with us through life. It can come in varying degrees, and its volume can be turned up or down based on the circumstances in our lives, but it’s there.

When we think about our time and the way we use it, we often get trapped in some pervasive myths that do not help us actually get into a healthier mindset about how we spend our time.

Let’s take a look at some of these myths, and also examine the real truth that can invite us to a different way of thinking and behaving.

I don’t know about you, but I have a tendency to make things harder for myself than they need to be. Like my “word of the year” process.

Last year, my word came to me pretty easily. It was a word that surprised me, but it came out of a very simple process. And I really appreciated having that word to guide me and ground me last year.

2023 is nearly over. 2024 has nearly begun. Both are “almost,” “not yet” and “not quite.” At this inflection point, what do you need to do to transition from one year to the next?

Do you need to end 2023 well?

Do you need to begin 2024 with positive intention?

Do you need to hit the ground running in 2024 with a solid, focused plan?

No matter what your need is, I’ve got you covered.

If you find yourself in some darkness right now, I invite you to “look on the bright side.” Not as a distraction or avoidance, not from denial or blind optimism. But from a place of hope, remembering that “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.” (John 1: 5)

The darkness will not overcome you either, friend.

As 2023 winds down, I thought I’d share about what it was like to live with a guiding word of the year. I’m amazed by all the ways that Harmony snuck into my life this year. It was typically in pretty quiet and unassuming ways… ways that I might have missed if I hadn’t been attentive. Yet, as I look back, I’m so grateful for that intentionality and for the gifts that Harmony has brought me.

What does “healthy self-care” mean to you? For me, it’s tending to what I need to show up as the best self I can be. That includes physical care, mental health, social/emotional connection, personal and professional development, and spiritual growth. When I reframe the question of “Isn’t that just indulging myself?” to “How can I tend to myself?” I see self-care from a different perspective.

All too often, we anticipate the holiday season eagerly, yet by the time it's over we grapple with exhaustion and disappointment. If this has happened to you, and you’re hoping for a different outcome this year, I’ll walk you through a simple step-by-step process for making this holiday season one that won’t leave you feeling empty or “just glad it’s over.”

Gratitude has immense power to change our perspective, open up new possibilities, and guide us in living our purpose. If we can agree on that premise, then I want to challenge us to really leverage that power.

I’m offering 5 gratitude prompts for this Thanksgiving. You might be used to “What’s something you’re thankful for this year?” That’s child’s play compared to these.

In the Catholic tradition, today – November 2 – is celebrated as All Souls Day, a special day to remember and pray for all those who have died. It’s a feast that I didn’t pay much attention to when I was younger – let’s face it, I was probably too distracted by the delights of my Halloween candy. And luckily for me, I didn’t experience any significant losses as a child.

That changes as we age, doesn’t it?

It was a fairly productive morning. A quick break for lunch. Then… a phone call that resulted in me rushing from the house and spending the rest of the day with an injured family member in the emergency room. When that phone call came, and throughout the critical moments when I was unsure about my loved one’s status, work didn’t matter. I don’t like those moments – because they are usually terrifying – but I’ll admit that they really bring home the point of Areas of Focus!

One way I’ve found clarity and direction in life is to remember the Jar of Life and put it into practice in my life. Maybe you’ve seen or heard the story about the teacher who brought a large jar, some big rocks, small pebbles, sand, and water to class to illustrate an important life lesson about priorities. Our lives are the jar, and the big rocks are called Areas of Focus. If we want to lead our lives, and not just live them, we need to put those rocks in first and prioritize those parts of our lives.

How much should our responses to our callings overlap? This model of calling invites us to think about our vocation as a set of three distinct (yet often interrelated) callings: the calls of faith, relationship, and work. And I suggested that we envision these callings as circles that can overlap, like a Venn diagram. So what does your “life calling diagram” look like? How much overlap is there? And most importantly, how is that working for you?

The three primary callings in our lives are not typically fixed or steady over our whole lifetimes. They are dynamic, and they move with the ebbs and flows of our life circumstances. if I asked what season you’re in related to the call of faith, how would you answer? At any given time, we are likely in very different seasons in each of our callings. Maybe your call of faith is in summer, your call of relationship is in autumn, and your call of work is in spring. What might this mean for you?

I get it. That’s a hard question. And it can be hard for a lot of reasons. For me, it was a challenge for a long time because I didn’t have a model of calling or vocation that was robust enough to fit my life. When I was in my 20s and 30s, I was really perplexed by this question of calling or vocation. I had grown up hearing that vocation meant living as a single person, being married, or being a priest or nun. Since I had chosen lay ministry as a career path – and felt deeply called to it – I didn’t see where I fit.

I don’t know about you, but there are certain quotations that pop to mind frequently to help me find – or take - the next right step. I have Brené Brown to thank for one of those anchors: “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.” I’ve been affirmed by this advice, encouraged by it, challenged by it, and yes, even shamed by it.

Did you know that September 12 each year is the National Day of Encouragement? The timing is not coincidental. Since September 11 is such a tragic day in American history, National Day of Encouragement is a counter-balance. It is a poignant reminder of the power of love and support that humans can offer one another – in grief, sorrow, difficulty, and tragedy. It is also a call to action – spurring us to do something simple to uplift someone else. So how will you observe the National Day of Encouragement this year?

Are you looking for a little more joy in everyday life? (Yes, it’s a trick question. Who says “no, thanks” to more joy??) So let’s assume you’ve got a hankering for some added joy in your life. I invite you to try one of these quick tips for a little pick-me-up. They may be suggestions you’ve heard before, but maybe this is just the friendly little reminder you need to actually DO one of these things.

For nearly nine years, I wallowed in frustration at the mess of my pantry’s bottom shelf. And I’m embarrassed to say that it was only a few months ago that I made a life-altering change. I added a basket. Finally! Structure, neatness, organization. No more stacked and sliding bags. No more chaos. No more muttering and swearing. Why am I sharing this? Because I quickly saw the life lessons (ones that I’m clearly still learning), and thought you might relate.

Review is all about noticing our energy, and it’s amazing what happens when we get intentional about noticing. In Atomic Habits, James Clear notes: “You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”  Review is one of those systems that keeps me on track – and gets me BACK on track when (not if) I get off-track. It is the most important system I have for being both productive and purposeful.